It Shouldn’t Have To Be This Hard!
You want your child to be happy, safe, and a learner at school. That’s not wishing for too much.
You hope there’ll be supportive friends for your child to have fun with, caring and knowledgeable teachers that expect your child to learn, and an accepting and nourishing climate in the school. That’s not hoping for too much.
So why does all of this have to be so dang hard? And better yet, what can be done so you can spend more of your time being a parent and less time being a teacher/counselor/negotiator/therapist/ IEP Police Officer?
Let’s quickly look at why some of the things we do are so hard and then we’ll move on to some possible solutions.
What makes being a parent/advocate a drag:
1. You are asking adults to change their behavior.
2. You’re working with people that don’t expect your child to learn much.
3. You are challenging outdated beliefs.
4. You’re dealing with people that need more training.
5. The work is never ending!
Yep! I bet you can identify with those statements above. Let’s flip the switch and look at some possible ways to get back some balance in your life.
How to be more of a parent and less of an advocate:
1. Spend time with your child doing something he loves to do. Take photos and post them on your refrigerator. These photos will be visual affirmations that life can be fun.
2. Snuggle together on your couch. Read books together, watch a favorite TV show or movie, reminisce about fun family times, and/or share what you love most about your child.
3. Get outside with your child and leave the electronics behind. Blow bubbles, go fishing, roll down a grassy hill, swing together at a playground, have a picnic in the backyard…just have it be something you and your child will smile while doing.
4. Take some time for yourself, call a good friend, take a nap, make time for a hobby, relax while listening to music you love to sing along with, do some gardening, or make a Summer Bucket list for yourself.
5. Find some humor in life, everyday. Look at throw-back photos of yourself and all the hair styles you have had (guaranteed to bring a chuckle), watch a favorite TV comedy show, tickle your kids and laugh with them, watch a YouTube video of 5 year olds trying to do jumping- jacks, or funny pet videos.
Make this summer be one of rejuvenation -– you time – and fun, old- fashioned family times. Choose joy this summer. Do things just for fun. Look with appreciation and gratitude for all the good that has come your way.
I can’t guarantee you won’t have to continue to advocate for your child, this will always be a role you’ll have. However, putting your parenting role first and aiming for more balance will help life be easier.
Of course, I’m just a phone call or email away if you want to touch base and get some personalized advocacy help. Call me at 208.340.5874 or email me at charmaine@cspeda.com
All my best to you,
Charmaine
